Saturday, October 4, 2008

Ugh. Parents!

They... WE... can be so annoying. And awful! Not all of them (us), but...

I can't stand holier-than-thous who feel like they can judge others. I think we all do it on occasion, but can we all agree... it's just not right? Some people may be (or be doing) blatantly stupid (things), but we're all human, not one moreso than another (well...) and who do we think we are, standing there being judgmental?

Yet, I judged today. Twice. I tried to just keep my thoughts in the "opinion" arena, but I got worked up. Here we go. I'll try to be as succinct as possible, but it's not always easy for me. You know.

Situation number 1:
We were hanging around the festival activities. There was some sort of car show going on. A man was "camping out" at the car show-- cooler, koozies, and all-- and he was yapping away to his friends/family. I suspected he was chemically imabalanced, but that shouldn't matter.

Here's the conversation/"reenactment" as best I can remember:
  • Man (pointing to a young boy, maybe 13, behind him): "Guess who was suspended last week? And guess why?
  • Friend (laughing): Fighting!
  • Man: FIGHTING! Well, defending himself.
  • Man goes over to boy (the one who was suspended) and high-fives him. Boy smiles, proudly.
  • A woman (the boy's mom?) says something indiscernible (plus, I don't remember the details of the parts that I did clearly hear), but it's clear that she is laughing and high-fiving right along. Or maybe she's doing one of those "I PROMISE I don't approve *giggle*" eyerolls.
  • Friend: What did he hit?
  • Man: He didn't hit low enough! HAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAA... etc.
I don't know what happened after that. We left. We were leaving anyway, but even if we had no plans to leave, I would have insisted on it. I certainly didn't want to catch anything, in case that "anything" was contagious. Ugh.

That's the kind of kid who would end up in my classroom. And I'd have a field day breaking him... breaking what the parents built...

Then again, I have been called a blowhard (you know)... so take it with a grain of salt. But please feel sorry for the kid. I hate to say he doesn't stand a chance with parents like that, but then again, I only got part of the story. Sigh.

Situation number 2:
We're walking through the "kid section" at the festivities today. There were a few little girls scattered around, all dressed up. I guess they were performing-- dancers, singers, etc. We got stuck behind a woman with two young girls. I assume the woman was the mother (yes, I know what happens when you assume). The girls were probably 8 or 9 years old (at most), both dressed up in some sort of costume/recital/performance gear. One was dressed as a princess; she was wearing a long, flowing, white and silver outfit with a cute little crown. Adorable!! The other girl... was dressed like a whore.

I'm sorry. I know that is vulgar. But I don't know how else to describe this outfit. It was black, silver, and red... dotted with bling... fishnet stockings complete with the line up the back of the leg... bikini top (fully revealed midriff) and a skirt that didn't even cover her little 9-year-old rear-end. Even the puff of ruffles on her rear ("Hey! Look here!! Ruffles!!" Ew.) didn't help. That's right... I saw cheek!!!! I could not believe it.

I don't know what kind of parent would let their child dress that way (even as a costume!), and I don't know what kind of parent would support violence in their child. I understand the need to stand up for yourself, and I fully support the efforts parents make (within reason) to help their children in that regard. And I fully support hobbies and extracurricular activities, as well as exercise, such as dancing or performing in some way (I'm not a fan, personally, of pageant parents/kids though... but that's another post). I just think that both of the children used as examples today have questionable guidance... and it really pissed me off today.

Then again, I only have part of the stories... which is a another reason I'm not fit to judge. How many people have YOU judged, only knowing part of the story? Not everyone's adult enough to recognize that. I'm working on it.



erin j said...

okay...fighting... not okay. defending yourself ... to an extent, but still if you are suspended, there will be no high fives, no reliving the event, no bragging (maybe to the spouse)but in my house, not condoned... there are ways to defend without hitting (says the woman certified in non violent crisis intervention baaaabbbby!)
The costume thing...sigh... this is my fear with the dance thing. these costumes get skimpier and then do you take your child out of something he or she might love because of the way they dress? maybe. but i know that as soon as the performance was over she/he would not be walking around in it in public.
dude, i judge all the freaking time. i'm grown up enough to admit it. i know people judge me. this doesn't make it right. i guess i try not to let my judging cloud friendships or whatnot. in fact, i try to listen to all sides, but i still judge. i tried not... it didn't work...

MizSassy said...

I'm not a fan of the pageant mom/children either! Nice blog! Perhaps I'll update mine one day. :-) When I'm feeling less insubordinate!